I shall believe
by m.mms
Summary: Lucas and Peyton. It happens in 5.18 and after that.


**A little explanation: **I'm satisfied and glad with how things turned out for Lucas and Peyton in 5.18 and 6.01 but one week before 5.18 aired, I heard there was gonna be an accident (that we found out later that it happened to Dan) and this idea came to my mind.

And on a side note, English is not my first language, so if you find mistakes at some points I apologize.

* * *

"Whatever answer you are searching for, you are not gonna find it like this, trust me, darkness doesn't have any answer Luke"…………

"You need to figure out what you want Luke……….Please stop hiding your heart, I mean it"……

"Lucas please stop running…..the day that you start to think love is overrated is the day that you are wrong. The only thing with belief, faith and love is not having it"………

Lucas was sitting in his room while he was replaying all this in his mind, he thought a lot about these and pretty much everything else that had happened and finally he had his moment of clarity, just like before. Finally he found the courage to face his feelings, now he knew what he wanted. He wanted Peyton and though he had screwed up while he was drunk and had told her those awful things 7 days ago, it was clear for him that Peyton had forgiven him. Those lyrics on river court that she painted were confirming that. Of course he always knew she had a big heart. So he thought since she already forgave him she might accept to be with him forever, though he wasn't sure what her reaction would be and he still was afraid of her not saying "yes" again but he was gonna take the chance and accept the risk because he couldn't continue being this lost and miserable anymore, also he was gonna explain the reason for his actions to her too. He took a cab. He wanted to go to airport, get two tickets to Las Vegas and then call her and ask her to marry him, Maybe it was a little crazy but he didn't care, he was just so tired of life getting in the way and he wanted to have her already and forever.

Lucas was sitting in back seat of a taxi and the traffic was unbelievable, the cars weren't moving at all, it was like they had parked there, in the middle of the street. Lucas was going crazy. He looked at his watch nervously and this was the second time that he was doing that in the last 5 minutes. The driver realized and said: "Are you in a hurry? I don't know how long it's gonna take….I think there has been an accident"

"That's Ok, I think I'm gonna walk and maybe a little further the traffic is better and I can take a cab from there, thanks" and came out of the car and started to walk. He walked a little and got to a crossroad that apparently there has been an accident in. That taxi driver was right. People were gathered there but they were further from those cars that had hit each other. There was also a cop that was trying to prevent people from getting closer but there wasn't an ambulance, it was like the accident only had happened a few minutes ago. Lucas wanted to pass and enter another avenue to find a way out of that whole mess, but then he paused, and asked one of the people: "what has happened here?" there were too many people so couldn't see and since he was in a hurry and didn't care enough, he didn't go closer to take a look, he just preferred to ask, and that woman was coming from front so she knew what exactly was going on. The woman was nervous: "God it's horrible, it happened right in front of me, that idiot guy ran the red light and hit the comet that was in front of me, now he is dead himself, and that poor girl in comet……"

Lucas' eyes became wide and terrified and he didn't hear the rest, he didn't even let her finish and asked: "what color was that comet?! What did its driver look like?!"

The woman got confused: "um, black, and it was a young blond girl, why?"

Lucas' eyes became even wider and didn't stay there another minute, he ran to the front as fast as he could and pushed people that were on the way and finally got to where he could see those cars, though he still had much distance from them, that cop hadn't let anyone to go closer and he was standing there himself. Lucas looked at the cars, yes one of them was the comet and HIS comet was in it, unconscious. Luke turned white from fear and his blood ran cold, being worried, shocked and scared. He started to run over there but that cop stopped him:

"You can't go there sir"

"Why are you standing here?! Why nobody helps to get her out of the car?!"

"She is stuck and also it's too dangerous there, the other car might explode in every second, we should wait until……"

He didn't want to hear more and he didn't want to waste more time, he just started to run towards the cars again. The cop got pissed: "I said you can't go there!" and tried to pull him back and stop him. Lucas just punched him and continued running even faster. He got to the comet, most of it was crashed. Peyton was in driver seat, unconscious and her head was leaning to the seat while blood was all over her mouth, nose and ear and her mouth was open. Lucas didn't even know if she was still alive or not, he tried to open the door but it was stuck and the other side and the back were pretty much destroyed, so he couldn't get to her in any way, the only way was breaking the window. He didn't want to waste even on second, considering what that cop said, so he didn't waste more time by searching for a hard thing to break the window, he just broke it by his fist and it got cut pretty bad and started to bleed but it was as if he wasn't feeling anything, he was just so determined to get her out of there as soon as possible and before it's too late. After he broke it, he touched her neck and felt a weak pulse, and sighed out of relief. Just then, Peyton opened her eyes and looked at him with half opened eyes, while she was seeing him in a fog, Lucas sighed again and slightly smiled, then stroke her head and said this while he was trying to stretch his hand to reach her and take her out, from the window:

"hey,….don't worry, I'm gonna get you out of here, and nothing will happen to you, I promise,…..just hold on, ok?" Then he carefully took her out from window ( though it wasn't easy to do), and carried her to where people were standing, where it was safe. And not a minute after he got there that other car exploded. People were looking with terrified eyes. Lucas sat on the ground while she was in his arms. Her eyes were closed and she was unconscious again. He put his head on her chest, while he was holding her. He wanted to see if she still was breathing: "you are still breathing, that' good!" Lucas said and chuckled slightly and nervously, though he still was terrified and worried as hell: "don't worry, you are gonna be ok, ok?". He paused, looked at her and as if he had just seen her like that right then, started to cry, then screamed: "somebody call an ambulance!" .That cop came towards him again, and this time softly said: "we've already called". After a short pause he whispered to her: "I love you,…….do you hear me? I love you more than anything…." Tears were flowing on his cheeks and he was crying silently while he was stroking her forehead. People were standing there, watching and feeling sorry for them.

Finally an ambulance arrived and two paramedics came towards him: "Sir, please put her down so I can help her". He still was shocked by all that and he really didn't want to let go of her but he had to. He put her on the ground slowly and that paramedic started to work on her, the other one took Luke's arm and took him a few steps away and said: "come on,…… let me see your hand" and tried to take a look at his injured hand that was still bleeding but Luke pulled his hand away from her and said: "my hand is fine"

"But it's bleeding, let me……."

He yelled this time: "my hand is fine…" and startled the paramedic, she stared at him while she was a little shocked. Lucas paused and softly continued: "my hand is fine,….please help her….., don't let her die". He was shaking. So was his voice, and there were tears in his eyes. She gently looked at him and wanted to say something that the other one yelled: "Kate get over here, I need your help! She is losing too much blood, we are losing her!" She went there quickly. Lucas went there too. They were trying to save her. Lucas was standing there, looking.

The other paramedic had already given Peyton oxygen and had injected blood serum to her, he told Kate: "Do the CPR". Kate started to pump on Peyton's chest. The other one charged the paddles and shocked Peyton's body.

"No response" Kate said and started to do CPR again. The other one charged the paddles and shocked her again. Kate paused, looked at him and shook her head. He said: "continue, I'm gonna shock her again". Kate started pumping again, the other one charged the paddles for the third time. Lucas' heart nearly stopped as he was standing there frozen and terrified. The paramedic shocked Peyton again.

Kate: I've got a pulse!

"Good, let's take her to hospital quickly".

They took her to hospital and Lucas rode there with them. After they got there, they took her to surgery room immediately. Lucas was standing in waiting room. He was leaning to the wall while he was completely frozen. He probably should have called the others or at least Brooke, but he was so shocked and his mind was completely shut down. He kept standing there for a while, then he just broke down and started to sob. He kept sobbing while he was sitting on the floor. Kate was passing that saw him, she knelt in front of him and kindly said: "Come on, let me take a look on your hand" (His hand was still bleeding.), then she took him to a room: "it needs a couple of stitches" and started to work on his hand. He was looking so broken and worn out.

"My husband and my 10 year old son were in an accident one year ago, so I know how are feeling right now……but, don't lose your hope,…have faith" Kate said while she was doing her job. Lucas remembered this quote of his own book: "but even in his darkest hours he knew in his heart that someday it would return to him, and his world would be whole again and his belief in god, love and art would be reawakened in his heart" he also remembered what Haley told him earlier that day: " the only thing wrong with belief, faith and love is not having it." He looked at Kate and whispered: "thanks". She smiled: "ok, I'm done…..I hope she'll be ok" .Lucas nodded and she left.

After more than 3 hours finally a doctor came towards Lucas, he stood up and looked at her with worried eyes but didn't say a word, doctor started to speak: "She had lost a lot of blood and had a lot of injuries in her stomach which we did our best to fix but she is in coma, because she has a thrombus in her head that is caused by a head trauma, but it's in a very vital and important part of her brain, so we can't do the surgery and take it out, it's too dangerous and risky. We just have to wait, sometimes it can be absorbed itself."

"Is it possible that it won't?"

"Yeah"

Lucas got so sad.

Doctor: "look, I'm not gonna tell you that she will wake up, 'cause honestly I don't know, only time will tell, but I can tell you that medically, it is possible for her to wake up, because she is not brain dead and she is breathing on her own which is a good sign."

Lucas nodded.

"You can see her if you want" the doctor said this and left.

Lucas went to her room. She was lying in the bed, hooked to blood serum, oxygen and a monitor. By seeing her like that tears came to his eyes again. It was hard for him to see her like that and it broke his heart. He went close and kissed her forehead softly and gently, and started to cry again. Then he sat on the chair beside her bed and took her hand: "hey,…..it's me…..I….." cried even harder "God….I don't even know what to say…….I just really need you to be ok, ok?.........I mean, you are gonna be fine, right?" clutched her hand and kissed it. "And I'm gonna be right here beside you" . And after a few minutes said: "I loved those lyrics that you painted btw……you know,……I was gonna go to airport tonight to get two tickets to Las Vegas and then I wanted to call you to ask you to marry me…….I also wanted to tell you some other things……but that damn accident…" kept crying and after a short pause continued:

"…anyway I'm gonna tell you the things that I wanted and I just really hope that you hear me,……, I'm so sorry for everything,…I don't hate you….I remember the first time I ever saw you…..all skinny arms and tangle mess of hair…." slightly chuckled though tears were still falling from his eyes, then paused a little: "letting you go was hard Peyton, losing you was hard, seeing you again was hard,…..it's still…really hard….. you know they were right, all of them, I was and still am in love with you, and the reason that I couldn't admit it was that…..I was afraid….I was afraid to get close to you again and somehow lose you again and I knew I wasn't strong enough for it, and I'm not, last time that I lost you it hurt me like hell…..so I just was trying to protect myself from getting hurt again and I know it was pathetic and I'm so sorry……but please… don't leave me, don't ever leave me, I can't handle it…….and if this is your way of punishing me,….it's just so cruel, because it's the exact thing that I was afraid of….. Whether I lose you by you rejecting me or by god taking you away from me, I just can't bear it…" He laid his head on bed beside her body while he still was clutching her hand, and kept crying until he finally fell asleep……

It was morning, Lucas went to wash his face that saw himself in the mirror of the bathroom and barely could recognize himself with that long hair, beard and pale skin. He also was hollow eyed and had lost some weight. All in all he was looking like hell. Haley came to his house: "hey"

"Hi"

"How are you?"

"Good"

"You don't seem good"

"Oh Haley please, don't start again"

"Come on Luke, you should stop this, it's not healthy, you don't get enough sleep, you don't eat much, you just go to work then you go to hospital and spend most of your time there, you even sleep there at most nights, you are barely home….."

"I want to be with her, she needs me and I need her"

"But Luke…."

"Please Hales, I know that you are worried about me and I thank you for that but right now I don't want to hear this"

Haley sighed: "Ah, you are always like this when it comes to her, you just won't listen, do you? Just like back then when you used to talk about her every day and was kinda delusional that she was sent from heaven or something and wouldn't listen to me that she is just a human like all of us" Haley said this to tease him and make him laugh, but he just stared at her as if an idea had just come to his mind. Haley got confused: "what?"

"Nothing, I should go" then went and left her even more confused……

He was at the roof of the building that used to be his mom's café. He pulled a brick from the wall and took a small box from it, then looked at it and smiled, put it in his bag and put the brick in its place after that…….

He entered her room and stroked and kissed her forehead kindly while he was smiling: "Hey, how are you doing?" then sat on the chair beside her bed and said: "today's song is cure love song" and picked a MP3 player from his bag and put the earbuds that were attached to it, in her ears. He had done this for 3 months (since she had that accident and went to coma). Each day he had played a song for her, the songs that he knew she loved. He was doing this everyday because he knew how much she loves music. When the song was playing he just kept looking at her and stroking her hair, after the song ended he took off the earbuds and put them back in his bag along with MP3 player, then said:

"I have a surprise for you today" and picked that little box from his bag "you know, before school started each year, me and Haley used to write our predictions for each year,….sort of like what we hoped that would happen in that year or in future, I'm gonna read some of mine for you" then picked some papers from that little box and continued: " freshman year: first kiss with Peyton Sawyer…….. Sophomore year: make out with Peyton Sawyer or more…….Junior: this year I'll definitely talk to Peyton Sawyer" he chuckled slightly: "I also used to talk about you constantly, especially to Haley, …and after the first time that I talked to you I got all excited and told her "Haley I talked to her!" and then she teased me and asked me if the fantasy was over and that now I could admit that you were human after all but…..I told her that you were not human and that you were an angel, my angel." then looked at her with adoration and stroked her head again: "I truly meant that" and got teary eyed, then after a short pause picked another paper : "here is another one, eight grad: Peyton Sawyer will become Peyton Scott" his eyes became even more teary that tears started dropping, his voice was shaking too: " you know, all of these predictions came true except this last one,……but I still hope that it will come true someday, and,……and I wait forever if I have to" then kissed her lips gently…….

Another week passed. It was afternoon and he was sitting beside her bed again, he was leaning his head to the chair but his hand was on the bed, holding her hand. His eyes were closed and he was trying to sleep that felt something touched his hand, he opened his eyes immediately and looked at her. Her eyes were open. Lucas kept looking at her in disbelief. Peyton slightly smiled at him and softly whispered: "hi". Lucas chuckled, though his tears were falling at the same time: "hi!" he went towards her quickly and kissed her forehead, then started to stroke her face as he kept looking at her.

Peyton: are you okay?....... you look like hell, like you are about to pass out from exhaustion…..

He chuckled again and nodded: "I'm fine……now I am" and kept stroking her "but you scared the hell out of me…."

Peyton slightly chuckled too: "but you saved me,……once again…like I always say, you're always saving me" and smiled at him, he smiled back: "somebody's got to", then got up: "I'm gonna go get the doctor"

"No, wait a second,…come here, I want to tell you something"

Lucas sat. Peyton continued: "when I was in coma, I had a dream……I dreamed that we were back in that hotel room in LA and you proposed to me and I said yes"

Lucas didn't know what to say, after a short pause he chuckled nervously and said: "it was just a dream, right?"

"It was my dream"

Luke got what she meant but still was afraid, like it was too good to be true, his mind was working to come up to say something but Peyton said: "…and my answer is "yes"…… unless of course you have changed your mind…."

Lucas got a little confused, Peyton continued: "you said yourself that you were gonna propose to me in the night that accident happened"

Lucas grinned: "you heard that?"

Peyton smiled: "yeah, I heard those other things you wanted to say to me too" Lucas nodded and Peyton continued: "…so, does your offer still stand?"

Lucas immediately responded this time while he was chuckling: "yeah!"

"Then my answer is yes" Peyton said and grinned. Lucas grinned too and kissed her lips……

The End


End file.
